Real stories about dating and relationships in New York City. Truth is more interesting than fiction.

Talking to Myself

Talking to Myself just a story  976206 98015020 300x200Last night I got the chance to take a look at my past.  A , close-up look.  Even have a little chat with my old self.  It was bizarre.

Here’s the story – I went out to dinner with friends (mini update – I’m still out of town, staying with friends). Early in the evening our waitress came over to our table to apologize for the delay. She admitted that the reason our entrees still weren’t out was that she’d goofed with the timing of the order and that it would be out soon(the funny thing is, we hadn’t realized it was taking a long time, she was just being conscientious).

She then proceeded to hang out with us. Kind of entertain us/keep us company for the next 5-10 minutes. I’m not sure why.  I guess she figured it would make the time pass faster?

We learned all about her, where she was from, how much she likes to drink… It was kinda weird. But not bad weird. Just weird.

Anyway, at some point she said she liked her job well enough and that it was better than sitting in an office all day and dealing with corporate politics. That anything was better than that.  My friend joked that she’d just described his job.  Which is true.  He has a very corporate job. Then she said something about getting us a round of shots, and I said no thanks. I pointed out that I still had work to do that night and was no longer able to do shots and go back to work. I used the phrase, “maybe 20 years ago”.

Then my friend pointed out that 20 years ago, I looked a lot like our waitress.  And OMG he was right. She was a total rocker chick with crayon red streaks in her hair (I would’ve been wearing more make-up, though) and the clothes to match.

So there we were, talking to a younger version of me. Well, not really a younger version. I guess you could say a younger incarnation. And she talked about how she hopes she never has to have a grown up job (my words, not hers). We all politely listened to her ramble, then as soon as she walked away, we shifted gears. Because, of course, we could remember sounding a lot like her. It’s strange the things you remember, 2 decades later. The things you can remember wanting and caring about.

She was so close to who we used to be. So sure she knew what her life might be like. Just like we were. And we were all so very wrong.


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5 to “Talking to Myself”


  1. rg says:

    Heh. With 22 year old and 15 year old daughters, I run into this scenario on a weekly basis. Life is so clear when you’re young (and by young I mean, like, younger than me – lolz).

    I recently ran into a friend on Facebook I hadn’t spoken to since high school. And the convo took me back to our senior year, when dreams were still far in the future and the world’s ills curable with a few shots. He hasn’t moved very far from that time, just the markings of age that make him look like a much older and more exhausted version of his former innocent (naive?) 1.0 incarnation.

    Thanks for the flashback…

  2. anny says:

    and sometimes, perhaps it’s good that we were wrong… makes me think of a line from a Garth Brooks hit… “one of God’s greatest gifts is unanswered prayers….”

    i wonder, with the slightest of melancholy, what things would have been like if i’d made different choices….would i have ended up in a different place, a better place?….but then, i would have missed the wonder of all i have been able to experience! AND… i’m in my 40′s … life ain’t even half-over yet! :)

  3. Wilmaryad says:

    Ah, good to find one’s way to here again. :-)

    For some reason, we often grow into opposites of what we predicted we’ll end up being like. I’m 27 and have no clue what I wanna do, nor do I have the slightest idea what I’d like to be.

    Take over Vanity Fair? :p Yeah, right!

  4. Gweb says:

    When I look at pictures of myself from 20 years ago, it’s like I’m looking at someone else. I remember the things that happened and how they felt, but it’s like I no longer identify them as having happened to ME. You can bet life will NOT turn out the way you imagined. I’m basically OK with that now.

  5. draman md says:

    Gosh!! Talking bout yester years..20 years ago i was 38 years old and 20 years prior to that i was 18! Thats the best years of my life.I was care free happy go lucky and nothing worries me except getting new girlfriend ..yes im kind of a playboy sort of guy but not really a playboy mind you. The reason i keep looking for new girfriend is not bcoz i slept with them but bcoz everytime a girl says she miss me there it goes…im scared..scared of being committed. So i start to keep my distance and look for another.Now at 58 im still having the same problem since my divorce in 1995..until now im still single. I guess i should go for platonic relationship.