It was yesterday, I think. I was cruising past my twitter stream and I saw a conversation in progress. Jack from Brooklyn was saying something (smart) about the fact that decent/real men shouldn’t need to make their women feel insecure. That a strong man would be making the woman in his life feel strong.
At least that’s what I thought I saw. I went back to look for it and couldn’t find it. Maybe I imagined the whole thing.
Anyway, it stuck in my head for the rest of the day. Because that’s something I’ve had trouble with. It’s been an issue with me in some of my relationships.
To demonstrate, here’s a sample conversation:
Me: ”When you do X it makes me feel bad. I wasn’t insecure when we met and all of a sudden I’m a bundle of insecurities.”
Guy: “I’m not responsible for how you feel. I’ve told you how much I like you.”
The idea that the man in my life might think it’s his responsibility to make me feel good about myself is utterly foreign to me. It sounds a little like a fairy tale. I’m tempted to ask if he rides in on a white horse.
I used to think that as long as someone wasn’t overty mean to me, and threw in words about how much he liked me every once in a while that he was a good guy. That he was “good to me”. But the reality is, I have no idea what it means to have someone make me feel strong. None. It sounds fabulous, though.
Just a random thought for a Saturday morning.
Tags: Jack from Brooklyn, Twitter