So once again I feel like the universe is trying to tell me something. But first the story.
Last night I was talking on the phone with one of my best friends in the world (it kills me that he left NYC a decade ago). We were talking about something going on in my life, something I should have dealt with a while ago, and he said that my problem was that I gave people too many 2nd chances. That I was too willing to wait and see how things worked out, even if my gut was telling me that things weren’t going to work out in my favor.
He held up my dating history as an example of this. I’ve clearly gone out with a lot of guys I shouldn’t have because I wanted to see how it would work out. And I’ve given lots of men second chances and third chances because I wanted to make sure they weren’t the one.
I told him he was absolutely right and that I’d try harder to listen to my gut.
“when a guy displays even a hint of weirdness or something that gives you pause or something that you just don’t like, kick him to the curb! Don’t analyze, don’t call, don’t second-guess — just give him the boot and move on to the next guy. Listen to what your instincts are telling you!”
So maybe this is the magic key, the piece of advice that will change everything for me? I haven’t been too picky (as so many people have claimed). I haven’t been picky enough. Or something like that.
What do you think? Do you think I should start being fussier about who I go out with (no more men who clearly lied about their age, for example)?
- Yes. Stop wasting time. (48 votes)
- No. It’s good to have an open mind. You never know who you’re going to click with until you spend time together. (11 votes)
- Other. Please explain in the comments. (12 votes)
Tags: Online dating, second chances