Meet – verb: to come upon; come into the presence of; encounter
Frequently, when I’m talking about a guy I’ll say that I met him online. But that, of course, isn’t really accurate. We connected online. But to meet a person implies coming into one another’s presence. To see, hear, encounter one another in the physical world.
Yeah, I have a point.
One of my great readers, You Make My Date, left the following comment on a post the other day, “…Now that I think about it, it seems obvious to have a secondary email…but when you’re doing online dating and you’ve been messaging back and forth a bit, it feels almost as though you know the person, so all defenses are dropped!”
I’m well aware of the phenomon she’s talking about. I’ve felt it too. That, OMG I really feel like I know this person feeling you sometimes get when you connect with a person online. But, I just wanted to use this opportunity to point out that you don’t. Know that person. That dozens of emails and flurries of texts and IMs and even a bunch of phone calls aren’t really getting to know a person. Not really. Not until you meet in real life.
Because, and here’s the SO obvious point, until you meet in real life you have no way of knowing if the 37 year old, 5’10”, althetic guy with salt and pepper hair who claims to own a house and a car and blah blah blah, is really who he says he is instead of some creepy guy (or woman) who’s really none of those things.
Which is why I’m so careful about (trying to) not get attached to guys before we meet. To not have too high of hopes for them. Because more than almost anything else in the world, I really hate being disappointed.
Tags: Online dating