Real stories about dating and relationships in New York City. Truth is more interesting than fiction.

Time to Change

I’ve been switching back and forth, for the past few months, between two services: and .  Sometimes using them simultaneously and sometimes just one or the other.  I like them both (each for different reasons, which I’ve mentioned before).  And, in fact, there are several dozen guys in NYC in my target demographic who are on both.

Well, I’ve decided it’s time to change.  I can no longer long onto nerve without seeing some guy I recognize (frequently someone I’ve already met and/or dated) on the homepage as a suggested match (In fact, this morning I logged on to see the faces of 3 guys I’ve already gone out with – out of the 6 they showed.  Go ahead and judge.).

And OkCupid, as much as I like it (and I do, I think they absolutely offer the best service) just doesn’t have that many guys for me.  I think I’ve hit a wall there.

Yep, definitely time to change.

Speaking of which.

Sorry, I couldn’t resist. I am SO a child of the 70s.

Anyway, a great thing about online is that while I’m off “changing”, a whole bunch of new guys will sign up for OkCupid.  So when I check back in a few months (if I’m still single) there will be new guys for me to meet and date there.

In the meantime, I’ve decided to check out some other sites and to make more of an effort to meet guys IRL.  Which is a timesuck, honestly.  I know there are people who think that online dating is a timesuck, but I see it as just the opposite.  I can fit in some time to check my online dating account in between working on a story, or the blog, etc.  Whereas making an effort to meet men in real time/in the real world is time consuming.  It means having less time to do some things I’d rather be doing.  Oh well.

As always, I’ll keep you updated on the developments.


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2 to “Time to Change”


  1. Singletude: A Positive Blog for Singles says:

    I couldn’t agree more about the timesuck-ness of dating! I can usually size up an online profile in under a minute. An actual date…well, even if I can size him up in under a minute, too, I still need to stay at least an hour for the sake of politeness. :D

    Have you considered the more generic sites like Match or Yahoo? On the downside, they’re just that–more generic. But I also found them to have more men who were looking for relationships rather than just friends with benefits, casual dating, or whatnot. This was in NYC and the NY suburbs.

    Oh, and thanks for the trip down Brady lane! I remember recording that song off the TV with my cassette recorder! How’s that for dating myself?

  2. Simone Grant says:

    Well, I have myself scheduled for a handful of event and parties for the next couple of weeks, and am considering match. I’ve done it before (a few times). The thing I like the least about it was just how suburban it was. Most of the men in my demographic were in white picket fence land and couldn’t understand why that wasn’t my dream destiny. Which it’s not. I rarely if ever date guys who live in the ‘burbs because I have no desire to live out in one and guys who live in the burbs don’t have much of a desire to live in the city.

    But, I’m thinking about it. Match, not moving to the burbs.