Real stories about dating and relationships in New York City. Truth is more interesting than fiction.

So Much For My Busy Weekend of Dates (and stuff)

So, earlier this week I was a busy, busy SINgleGIRL.  Emailing and texting and talking with boys about dates for this weekend.  It looked like I had first dates on Thursday night(I kinda consider Thursday night the unofficial start of the weekend) and Saturday day (today) and then a , probably, on Saturday night and a playdate with my planned for Friday night.  And then there was an additional guy who kept saying, “this weekend” for our but he seems incapable of making plans and quite frankly I’m not interested in doing all of the work for him.

Anyway, it looked like a full and enjoyable weekend.

And then on Wednesday I got on email from Mr. Thursday night.  He said that he was still interested in meeting me, but that’s he’s had a few promising dates with someone else and so he was thinking of me as a potential new friend (and he then went on to say how much he’d like to be my friend with specific reasons, which I thought was pretty cool).  And then he said that he knew that most people weren’t into meeting new friends and if that was the case he understood.

First off, I just thought it was awesome that he was being honest about his situation.  Most guys, in my experience, continue to date/meet new people for a long while.  He’s gotta be a pretty decent fellow to not want to be meeting/dating new chicks because of some woman he’s only slept with once or twice (I’m guessing).*  So I said, yeah, let’s meet up.  I love having guy friends. But I rescheduled to next week (there’s a story behind that).

Then, yesterday morning I wake up to find a text from the fuck buddy that he had an emergency and had to leave town.  Of course.  He’s supposed to be back tomorrow but I’m not holding my breath.  This happens about 60% of the time with him.  VERY ANNOYING and FRUSTRATING.

My date today, which I’ve been very much looking forward to is scheduled for an outdoor venue.  The city has actually cooled off, but it’s damp and looks like it just might rain again.  Dammit.  Dammit.  Dammit.  I’ll reach out to him in a little while and suggest a plan B if I don’t hear from him.

And my second date?  This guy’s popped back into the picture.  An apologetic emall last week.  And we’ve emailed back and forth.  And now he’s disappeared again.  And I’m not making any attempt to express further interest.  None.   My interpretation of the current situation is that he really is swamped with work.  And who knows, maybe he’s seeing someone else now.  I don’t think so.  But maybe.  I think it’s more a possibility that he’s just swamped and doing the hermit thing. And I get it (I did it for years).  But I’m not interested in chasing him or pulling him out of it.

Ugh.

Anyway, there’s still hope that my date this afternoon will be awesome in an alternative venue and that the fuckbuddy will get his ass back to town sometime tomorrow.  Wish me luck.

*Yes, I’m aware this could be his way of keeping me “on the back burner” in case his new chick doesn’t work out.  But he could just as easily have done that by NOT telling me the truth for a first date to see if we hit it off.  I admire people who tell the truth.


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4 to “So Much For My Busy Weekend of Dates (and stuff)”


  1. dazediva says:

    Honestly is so important in the start of any relationship – and it’s cool that Thursday date man was able to be straight with you about his thoughts and was open to your reaction on his thoughts as well.

    It’s only courtesy for someone to let you know if they really are that swamped with work – so hopefully 2nd date guy will send you a text message to let you know he’s been busy and hence the lack of communication. It really doesn’t take more than 30 seconds to write a text out – NO ONE is THAT busy …

    Hope you have a great afternoon :)

  2. Liverpoolgirl says:

    Simone-I would just ditch them all. I am currently having a reminiscent evening listening (and watching!) Lloyd Cole and The Smiths and it is reminding me of my youth. BUT – the most important thing it is reminding me of, is who I am, and what’s important to me i.e. my music, my family, my friends. You have all of these things and you are wonderful xxxx

  3. Simone Grant says:

    -dazeddiva
    I don’t think that second date with Mr. Too Busy is ever going to happy. That’s cool though. Last night’s day was good + a reminder that I really shouldn’t be spending any time thinking about guys who don’t call.
    -Liverpoolgirl
    Thanks darling (and welcome to my comments section). I’ve been doing a lot of that lately, listening to old music and remembering how very lucky I am. The things I don’t have are all things I can live without.

  4. drumdance says:

    60%?! Dang!