My phone has been acting weird for a while. Freezing and stalling and yesterday it seemed to go completely bonkers (I should be more specific – my iphone. I’m going to head over to the Apple store sometime tonight to see if they can figure out what’s wrong with it.) I was wrestling with it for a while yesterday and as I did I accidently called some people I didn’t mean to. Or rather, I accidently pressed the numbers of some people I didn’t mean to.
Which is kinda awesome in it’s own way. Because the ones I love all called me back. So something good came out of the something bad.
One of the people who called me back is a dear friend of mine who lives far, far away. We usually see each once a year, at most. But one of the things I’ve learned as I’ve gotten older is that friendships aren’t measured by how much time you spend with people. There are people who I’ve spent thousands of hours with who I don’t trust enough to be there for me in an emergency. Others I only see every other year, but I’d trust them with my life.
Anyway, she’s one of those trust them with my life people. She’s happily married and has been for years. And over time she’s given me some relationship advice that I try to keep in mind (I’m not sure she realizes this).
One of the things that really sticks with me was something she said right after my last break-up. Things were extremely bad for me, emotionally. I’d fled New York (the country, actually) to try to get my head together. But I couldn’t. I was completely overwhelmed with sadness. And she said something about maybe we shouldn’t have split up. That maybe I should contact him and see how he was doing. That maybe he was as sad as I was. And that, “if it was only my pride” keeping me from doing it, then I should go ahead and do it. That seemed reasonable to me. And mature. I didn’t want my pride getting in the way of my happiness.
Anyway, this isn’t a story about me and the ex. This is a story about how happy I am that I have good friends, friends who will tell me the truth. And who wil help me pick up the pieces when everything has gone to shit.
Tags: ex-boyfriend, friends