Real stories about dating and relationships in New York City. Truth is more interesting than fiction.

Just In Case

I feel like I have to remind you guys, every once in a while, that I’m a real person.  Just in case you forget.

I spent most of this morning crying.  Over stuff that I’ve been keeping to myself.  Well, only sharing with my closest friends because I didn’t want someone who might read this blog to find out about it.

But someone hurt me.  Someone who has hurt me many, many times before.  Someone who seems to take great pleasure in hurting me.

I’m not sure why, exactly.

Anyway, it’s exhausting.  Really exhausting.  The manufactured and the lack of sleep.  All of it.  And the last thing I need is people who don’t know me making my life more difficult here on the blog. So when I ask, repeatedly, for people to just be a little nicer to one another and to me here in the , I’d appreciate it if people would listen.

I love this blog, I do.  And I love reading the comments.  But I’ll shut them down completely if people continue to be pricks.  That is all.

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8 to “Just In Case”

  1. DateDoctor says:

    It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.
    -Theodore Roosevelt (The Man in the Arena Speech)

  2. drumdance says:

    Really sorry to hear that – what a downer! Though I sometimes post comments that challenge what you write, I still think you’re a terrific writer and enjoy your blog immensely.

  3. babygirl Karma says:

    Hope you feel better, sweety!! I love the way you write and what you write about!! From what I can tell, YOU ARE AMAZING!! I only know you from what I’ve read and my gut never fails me!! It’s not write that people try to make themselves feel better by trying to tear others down!! Keep up the good work…for all those we make u shed a tear….hopefully there are 10 that make you smile!!! Lots of love…

  4. bellaressa says:

    Om my, I hope you don’t allow the a**holes to get to you, you are a good person and I hope you know that, you may not believe but I see from the comments that your blog and your experiences have helped others here and have given them hope. I just wanted you to know that you do make a difference even though we don’t see you, your words do the work.

  5. HilaryC says:

    Ok – I’ve been lurking for a few months (I reviewed your blog for Scribnia and stuck around – the review was positive, natch), but this post brought me out of the woodwork to just simply say this:

    You are a wonderful and charming woman. I adore the honesty and personality in your writing, and I think you portray your topic and yourself with grace. You’re a blogger now, darlin’, and you’re gonna get trolls. It’s just the nature of the beast. But I think if you approach them (the trolls that is) the way you do the put-offs from your online dating dudes, you’ll be fine. They don’t even exist, so they don’t matter.

    I would hate to see you close your comments because I really enjoy reading what others have to say in response to your posts, but I know that advice up above is harder to take than to give. Just keep your chin up and don’t let the bastards grind you down.

    BTW – you remind me often how glad I am not to be “out there,” but someday I’m gonna have to go back, and I think your advice is level-headed and awesome. I plan to take it . . . eventually.

  6. Singlegal says:

    I’m going to kick someone’s ASS! Give me some names. @goodbyegal and I can be wicked scrappy when we want to be!
    In all seriousness, I know how you feel. But you, my dear, are lovely and amazing. Never forget it!

  7. damiella says:

    I certainly meant no offense by my comments on Twitter yesterday and am sorry if they added to your bad day in any small way. I didn’t mean that you should let yourself be berated by commenters who were trolling the blog. My concern was that you would censor the comments that criticize or challenge what you write, when that is one of the blog’s strengths, its ability to raise spirited discussions with varied opinions.

    Yes, you are a real person, and everyone should bear that in mind when commenting. But you are also a person who is choosing to share your life in a public way, which makes you a target to a wide range of feedback from strangers. If you’re going to put yourself in the spotlight like that, having a thick skin is essential. You can’t ask for all the attention (whether it’s feedback to your blog, survey questions, fans on facebook, attendees to your dating seminar) and then backpedal when some of it is negative. There is always going to be some negativity associated with being in the public eye, that’s just the way it is.

    But again, any criticism I offer is meant to be constructive, not hurtful. I find your blog entertaining and if anything, I wish you would share more of yourself on here (back in the day, I found blogging through a depression and getting support and positve comments from strangers oddly therapeutic). I hope the bad time you’re going through now passes soon.

  8. aguy says:

    I really feel like you set the tone for the blog, Simone. When you write nice things, people are generally nice; when you go on a rant and attack people as stupid and idiotic, well… but anyway, sorry you were having a bad day.