This was not at all what I had planned to write about today (Oh, and another quick apology for the late posting. Lostplum and I went out for drinks last night and I was in no shape to write when I got home. Truth is, I did do some other work late last night and I am seriously sleep deprived now and so please forgive me the inevitable typos.) Anyway, last night was the second night of Dating Bootcamp and by my count they mentioned the 90 day rule 7 times. It might have been more, as I was furiously taking notes in between sips of champagne.
No, I will not go on another rant about this.
It’s silly, but people are allowed to be silly. In fact, people make a lot of money being silly.
A couple of days ago I read something equally silly about sex and waiting that I wanted to share with you, and get your opinion about, as it’s in the same vein of thought. As many of you know. I now write for Ignighter’s Magazine. They have a lot of different bloggers and we all have very different perspectives. One of them wrote this last week,
“Because, as was recently pointed out to me, if two people really like each other, the sex is pretty much automatically gonna be good. Thus my advice to my fellow Ignighter daters shouldn’t come as rocket science, and is probably something that most girls figured out a long time ago (though as something of a one-time slut, I can’t really believe I’m the one offering it up): If you’re serious about finding something real, then relax about the sex, and take time to actually get to know someone. Do that, and when you finally do get to know them them, you know, biblically, I think you’ll find it that much more worth your while.”
The italics and underlining were added by me, btw.
So, it’s this guys (his name is Andrew and I’m sure he’s a very nice young man) contention that if two people really like each other then the sex if automatically going to be good. I call bullshit. Loudly. BULLSHIT!!!!
Been there. Doesn’t always work like that, honey. Sorry. Maybe if you don’t really know much about sex, or aren’t very experienced (I’m not pointing any fingers, I’m just saying that some youngish guys and gals aren’t all that hard to please because they don’t even know what good sex is, yet). But I have actually ended a relationship with a man I adored (it was mutual) because we were just not sexually compatible. And yes we tried. We really tried. For months. And we drove each other nuts.
Anyway, I’m starting to rant again. There is a question here. I guess I wonder if I’m in the minority, here. If maybe I’m the jaded old lady in the room and everyone else, or most everyone else agrees with the nice young man.
If two people really like each other will the the sex automatically be good? (and let’s assume they’ve waited at least 5 or 6 dates, maybe even longer).
- Yes (2 votes)
- Yes, unless one of them has some serious issues or is lacking in some special way. (13 votes)
- No. What a stupid thing to say. How you feel about a person is one thing. Sex is something else. (32 votes)
- Not really. Caring about a person can make sex more special, but that’s about it. (62 votes)
Tags: 90 day rule, dating bootcamp, ignighter, polls