Real stories about dating and relationships in New York City. Truth is more interesting than fiction.

Not a Happy Mother’s Day Post Part 2 – Long Island Wine Country

So this post is both the second part of Not a Happy Mother’s Day Post and my regular Monday, Best Date Spot post.  Let’s see if I can pull this off.

We hadn’t talked much about the trip, in advance.  I’d never been out to the North Fork before, had no idea where we were staying, and no idea what to expect.  I think I remember him telling me to pack an overnight bag and then telling me specifically what to put in it.  But maybe that’s my memory playing tricks with me.

After we’d been on the road for a while we came to the part of the island that’s sprinkled with wineries. Yes, wineries on Long Island.  He pulled into one of the first ones we came to.  And we then spent a good part of the late morning and all afternoon going from one winery to the other, tasting wine.

The wineries are gorgeous.  Almost all of them are just spectacular places to look at.  The wine, well, some of the wine was OK, some was a little bit better than OK and some was pretty bad.  Our big mistake was that we hadn’t planned our day out in advance.  He pretty much pulled into almost every winery we saw unless the parking lot looked too crowded (I was a bigger drinker then, and he could drink).

I’d love to head back out there again, maybe with a guy I was dating, and this time have a list of wineries that we knew we wanted to hit.  You know, do some research about which ones actually have the best wine.

Because really, of all of the day trips there are within a 4 hour drive of the city(factoring in traffic), this one has got to be on my top 3 list for places to go on a warm spring day.

We finished with the wineries and made our way further down the island.  At some point we even stumbled upon a private beach (I think he must have been there before) and had sex out there on the rocks.

But then, sometime after sex and before we made it to our final destination (a small town at the end of the island) he got a phone call.  He stepped away to take it (we’d stopped to get something to eat  – all that wine and sex had stimulated our appetites) and so I’m not sure what was said, but his mood changed radically.  He became sullen and nasty.

I’ll fast forward.  We didn’t end up staying.  We made it to our final destination, but instead of checking in to the hotel, we just got out of the car and walked around for a few minutes. By then he’d stopped speaking to me.  And then we got back in the car and headed home. With no explanation from him.  I tried, for about an hour, to get him to talk to me.  To cheer him up.  Anything.  But he just sat there in silence, oblivious to the fact that I had feelings and that his actions might be affecting me.

And then he started to talk again.  He didn’t apologize or explain himself.  I think he started to talk about the traffic, which was horrendous. It took us forever to get back home.  But by then I was done.  With him and his bullshit and letting him step all over me.  I just told him that I was tired and didn’t feel like talking. We drove pretty much the whole way in silence.

He dropped me off outside my apartment and said he’d be back in a few minutes (he kept his car in a garage a few blocks from my apartment).  In the 15 minutes it took him to park his car and get back to my place I found all of the things he’d left at my apartment (a shirt, a belt, toothbrush…) and put them in a bag.  I handed him the bag as he walked in my door.

It was the first time I tried to with him, but sadly, not the last.


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6 to “Not a Happy Mother’s Day Post Part 2 – Long Island Wine Country”


  1. Anonymous says:

    I feel like you’re leaving a lot of details out. What was the phonecall about?

  2. Anonymous says:

    It sounds to me like it was his wife or some other relationship calling and that he was cheating on someone with you.

  3. MVD says:

    An engaging read, but you leave me wanting more. At very least you squeezed in coitus (and a nice buzz) before the mystery interruption.

    Here’s a little wine story for ya:
    http://essentialbastard.blogspot.com/2009/02/confessions-of-amateur-oenophile.html

  4. lostplum says:

    Not the last……..that says it all ;)

  5. Shannia says:

    Reading this post today made me so sad. It hits home, unfortunately. I feel you on this one and I would love to read hoe you got over him, maybe in another post, if you feel like sharing.

  6. SINgleGIRL says:

    -Anonymous & Anonymous
    I honestly do not know the contents of the phone call. He was in the middle of an ugly divorce and custody battle. I’m pretty sure the call was his ex/soon to be ex. I knew that there was no point in asking, because he wouldn’t tell me. Just get angrier and nastier.
    -MVD
    Welcome to the blog. Well, I like to throw in a little slap and tickle when I can.
    -lostplum
    Yep. I didn’t want to get into the messy details. Sometimes it’s just better to say less.
    -Shannia
    This is one of those cases when I’m sorry someone could relate. I’m sure I will write about him again sometime (this was the winner who said, “I never lied to you. I am divorced. From my first wife.”). What I can tell you now is that things got very ugly in the weeks following this and ended for good on Memorial Day (so about 3 wks later). I had to almost immediately get out of town for the week and just spend some time alone. I couldn’t deal with people. With anything. I was just so angry.