I had a date on Monday night. A first date. It wasn’t a bad date. It wasn’t a good date. It was a strange date. So strange that it took me a few days to figure out what I wanted to say about it.
Strange. I can’t think of any other word to describe it. He was easy going and sweet before we met, maybe a little treacly. He wanted to “chat” online, something that I pretty much never do (I don’t get it. If someone wants to communicate in real time, one-on-one, then they should pick up the damn phone.). But I logged onto to my yahoo chat and we chatted and he was sweet and we made plans. He suggested we meet at a wine bar in my ‘hood as I was crunched for time, which was fine by me.
I’m never surprised when a guy looks nothing like what I expect. It’s pretty much a 50/50 thing. Not only didn’t he look like what I expected (not shorter/taller/fatter but just different) but he was giving off this bizarre vibe. I can’t really describe it except to say that at first I was thinking he might be one of those sad guys who is gay and in deep denial (i’ve been on a few of those dates). But then, almost immediately, he started to get rather handsy with me. He kept brushing my hair off of my shoulder and touching my leg and my arm. It would have been all very sexual except that it wasn’t. Instead it felt like I was just playing a part, “girl on date”. I didn’t even bother stopping him because it just seemed, well, harmless. Like I was being grabbed at by another actor, “man on date”.
The funny thing is that we had a lot of fun. We ended up hanging out with the people sitting next to us at the bar (it’s a locals kind of place, very friendly) and talking for about an hour longer than I’d planned on staying out. He’s a fun guy. I could see us being friends.
Anyway, we’ve been in touch since but there’s been no talk of getting together again. Just pleasantries. I may just go for it and invite him to do something as friends and then see if he can keep his hands to himself. We’ll see.
Tags: Dating update, denial, first date, sex, wine bar