Phew. I’m on Day 5 of my current quest to unearth the secrets of online dating success. OK, screw that. I’m on Day 5 of my assessment of a few of the services that I wasn’t using before and will probably never use again. Here’s the latest:
OKCupid – I received a few messages from men I’d never in a million years go out with. I tried doing another pretty comprehensive search of their member base to see if maybe I was being too judgemental in my initial assessment, but no, I wasn’t. They just don’t have any guys on there in my demographic/area who I’d be interested in. Decent service but not for me.
eHarmony – I awoke Saturday morning to an email box full of messages from eHarmony. It seems they had lot of members who wanted to meet me. I guess I prompted some kind of action when I updated my pics. So, as I’d promised myself I would play along I logged onto their service to try to check these guys out. Well, as someone using the free trial membership I couldn’t actually check them out. I could only see part of their profile. And, guess what, that part didn’t include the picture.
I have, on occasion and on other sites, replied to men who didn’t post pictures but who said they would send them later. I understand that some people have jobs that make them feel weird about posting their photos. But in this case there was no way I was going to waste any time communicating with eHarmony’s members without seeing them first. The couple of guys I met on eHarmony my last time around were total losers. Actually, that’s too polite. They were the kind of guys that losers look to and think, well at least I’m better off than him.
So I sent a nasty email to eHarmony’s customer service (which, by the way, took me 5 minutes to figure out how to do – I hate when they hide that info). I told them to immediately discontinue sending me emails and that included information about future sales and free introductory weekends as their service was pathetic (not actually the way I phrased it, but you get the idea).
24 hours later and my email box was still filling up with emails from them about potential new matches and so I clicked on one of them and replied to the address you can contact for urgent business or whatever. My second message was probably even less polite as they replied the second time with a generic, “we’re sorry you decided to discontinue service” and I haven’t received anything from them since. I just keep wondering over and over, why are they so popular (no means of a realstic test drive before you purchase, high prices, plenty of competitors, poor customer service, lots of dissatisfied customers)? Are people really that desperate? Or stupid?
Chemistry.com – is still proving to be a giant time suck. I’m asked to review about 10-25 potential guys a day. I have to give them all a yea or nea. This takes about 30 seconds each. Additionally, I currently have 34 guys in my “active match” pool. These are men who I am in one of the 4 stages of communication with. Some of the stages are tedious, others just take a lot of time. Honestly, I’m just keeping some of the guys in a holding pattern because they’ve said something seriously stupid in one of the short answer questions. Others haven’t gotten back to me in days. Whatever, it’s all very time consuming. I guess if I were super picky in my inital assessments and only let 1/10 of the guys into the active match stage then it wouldn’t be that time consuming. And honestly, if I were using it for real and not to write about, most of these guys wouldn’t have made it through. They are not the creme de la creme of the NYC area eligible bachelors.
Of these three services, this is the only one I’d consider using, but it’s wicked expensive so I’ll be killing it on Wed when my free trial is nearing it’s end. It’s OK – but not worth more than a few dollars a month and certainly not what they’re charging for it.
There are still several other services I plan on trying and writing about. I’ll get around to them just as soon as I finish up my trial with Chemistry. Until then, I just don’t have the time.
Tags: chemistry.com, Eharmony, OKCupid, Online dating