Real stories about dating and relationships in New York City. Truth is more interesting than fiction.

Two Down

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with me.  Really I don’t.  I’m just having a bad dating week.

Tuesday night was a with a man that I should have liked.  He was drop dead gorgeous.  So good looking that if he wasn’t that bright he could probably coast on his looks(not with me, but you know, in general).  But he is bright.  Really bright.  Ph.D. in a topic that blows my mind – bright.

I was looking for an exit strategy after about 20 minutes.  I didn’t like him.  I should’ve just finished my drink quickly and made a polite, early goodbye and left.  I didn’t, though.  Because I kept thinking to mysef that if I just gave it a few more minutes I’d start to like him a lot.  On paper he was my dream guy.  Really.  My dream guy.

I stayed way too long.  By the end of the night I’d made a mental list of all of the things I didn’t like about him.  It was a long list.

He emailed me first thing the next morning, telling me how much he enjoyed meeting me and saying he’d like to get together soon.  I didn’t reply right away because I really wanted to like him.  Isn’t that silly?  It’s like there was a war going on in my mind.  One side saying – he’s amazing, go out with him again, it was just one bad date.  The other side was saying – you stupid shit, you know enough to know he’s bad news.  And then I let the whole day go without emailing him.  And then the next thing I knew it was too late to email without seeming odd.  So now I’m the rude bitch who didn’t even have the decency to send a no thank you email.

Then last night was the with the guy I went out with last Friday night.  The one with whom I had that really awesome first date.  The one I hadn’t given a nickname yet.  It was such a lame date.

He asked me if I liked sushi.  I love sushi.  He gave me the opportunity to pick a place and I demured to his preference.  He picked a place really, really far from where I live that just wasn’t that good.  Now I’ll travel to the ends of the earth, in a snowstorm, for good food.  But please don’t made me travel far for mediocre food in the dead of winter.

And I wore a dress.  A cute little mini-thing.  Not quite warm enough for it, but I wanted to look nice for him.  He didn’t seem to notice.  Not even “you look nice tonight”.  He was wearing what appeared to be a sweatshirt, jeans and sneakers.  Talk about no effort.

And we just didn’t have as much fun.  Our conversation was kind of dull.

Gosh, maybe it is me?

Anyway, I rescheduled tonight’s date.  I was supposed to have another first date tonight, but I’m really not up to it.  Not physically and not emotionally.  We’re going to get together sometime on Saturday instead.  And I’m still very much looking forward to my second date with the Musician tomorrow night.  Wish me luck.


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5 to “Two Down”


  1. Teifion says:

    You talk a lot about having good or bad dates. What are you looking for from dating?

  2. SINgleGIRL says:

    -Teifion
    I am looking for a serious relationship. Silly me.

  3. cjw666 says:

    A serious relationship will only come from being with someone you already know quite a bit about and like and who likes you. Therefore, you’re gonna have to go through this shit to find that someone – you know that already.

    Maybe you’re, like you say, looking forward to the musician and that’s colouring your view of everyone and everything else at he moment?

  4. 20forty says:

    It’s a winnowing process I suppose. One I know I’m just not up to lately. My attitude sucks and it shows in the amount of fun I have, the connection I feel, and in just about everything else date related. It could be that’s what’s happening with you or maybe because something in you is thinking there’s a lot of potential with the musician and thus not really in the right frame of mind to open up to the possibilities the others might have. Maybe after you see him again you’ll have a clearer picture.

  5. SINgleGIRL says:

    -lisaq(20forty),
    I’m sorry to hear that you’re having such a rough time right now and I can totally relate. I just think with me it was these guys. Or not? Who knows.
    -cjw666,
    Yep, I have to go through this first stage of vetting before I can get anywhere near a relationship. It totally sucks.