Real stories about dating and relationships in New York City. Truth is more interesting than fiction.

I Said the Word

I’m doing yet another short term gig.  Just started last week.

We’re on skeleton crew this week, which I kinda like.  No one really knows me here, which I kinda like.

I was sitting at my desk actually doing a tiny bit of work when my phone made the loud bling sound it makes when I get a new text.  The volume was up really high (oops) and someone nearby turned to look at me.  It was Mr. Potential, texting me good morning.  I was happy to see it.

The nosy person who noticed my phone bling asked me about my text (some people have no shame).  And I replied, “It’s just my texting me good morning.  He’s in California with his family for the holidays.”

That’s the first time I’ve used that word in reference to Mr. Potential.  Boyfriend.  Before, I’ve always called him, “the man I’m dating”.

So that’s that.  I don’t know how I feel about it.  Maybe it’s premature.  Maybe it’s about damn time.  I don’t know..  But I opened my mouth and out it came.


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10 to “I Said the Word”


  1. Teifion says:

    I think it’s a good sign :)

  2. RebeccaDeos says:

    Sometimes we answer questions in a way that they close the conversation to more questions. Saying “The man I’m dating” can easily be percieved as a conversation opener. “Boyfriend” is more cut and dry, and less likely for someone to have a followup question.

  3. ZJapan says:

    That it came out so naturally is nice and sweet. I hope that he feels the same way. Good luck and keep us posted.

  4. recklessstudio says:

    That’s never a bad sign. Just take it in and enjoy it.

  5. bobbyjensen says:

    I think you see a lot more good qualities in him than bad and at a comfortable point in the relationship. You may use the word “Boyfriend” in a story to him to see his reaction.

  6. cjw666 says:

    He’s a friend and he’s a guy and you’re dating, so he’s a boyfriend. What either of you chooses to read into that as time goes on is up to you, but I think it’s a good sign. Happy Christmas.

  7. SINgleGIRL says:

    -Rebecca Deos,
    I think you may be right. I hadn’t thought of that before but your explanation is a great one.
    -bobbyjensen
    I’d be scared to do that. I wouldn’t want to send him running scared. I have been so much more (verbally and emotionally) open with him already than he’s been with me. I think he’s going to have to do something to show me it’s ok to use the word.
    -cjw666
    Oh, I wish it were that simple. But maybe you are teasing?
    -recklessstudio, Zjapan and Teifion,
    Thank you all for your warm wishes and Happy Holidays.

  8. bobbyjensen says:

    sure, I understand. I guess it’s in the see what happens category for now.

    Merry Christmas!

  9. cjw666 says:

    -SINgleGIRL: Well, yes, I AM sort of teasing, or being light-hearted at least. But the the fact is, it IS that simple, if you make it so. To me the worst that can happen is that you’re wrong and he’s holding back for some scurilous reason of his own. So what? You get conned in a sort of way and hurt for a while, but surely that’s better than all the anguish you seem to be going almost endlessly through at the moment.

    There are only two major outcomes from this – either you and he will turn into one hell of a good long term relationship, or you won’t. Why do you want to know all the outcomes in advance? Life (and particularly love) is an adventure – enjoy it and if it goes belly up somewhere along the line, at least you’ll have a FEW good memories, eh? What are you really so AFRAID of?

  10. SINgleGIRL says:

    -cjw666
    I am afraid of being wrong. Again. And right now I can’t think of anything worse than that (well I can, lots of things, but nothing in the Sex, Lies… world). I have been wrong too many times and if I am wrong with Mr. Potential then I just don’t think I’ll ever be able to trust anyone, ever again.