Real stories about dating and relationships in New York City. Truth is more interesting than fiction.

The Weekend is Over

I’m not quite sure I have anything new to report.

Mr. Potential sent me a very sweet email yesterday morning, to which I replied, and an even sweeter text today(and then we texted back and forth for a while). Yet, we don’t have plans to see each other again and I have to say that annoys me. I really don’t like taking the lead on that stuff. Which is silly because every bad boyfriend I ever had did the whole ‘sweep me off my feet thing’ to a T. You’d think I’d want just the opposite now. But I don’t. Not really.

I’ve made it super clear (I think) that I like him. When I didn’t invite him up on Friday night I specifically said, “not tonight”. And I respond affectionately to all of his and emails. I’m going to just try to be patient for the next couple of days and see what happens. If an invitation doesn’t come along for something, then I’ll act.

In other pseudo- news: The Freelance reappeared. I didn’t hear from him all week, after our pretty good date last Friday night and our follow up emails last weekend. Then nothing Monday – Friday. By Thursday I’d pretty much written him off. I figured he just wasn’t that into me and well, whatever. There are way too many fish in the sea to get freaked out about a guy I’ve gone out with twice and never even kissed.

Then he called me yesterday afternoon and left me a vm (I didn’t hear the phone). I sent him an email as a reply. I started with, “I thought you disappeared”, but made it clear I wasn’t mad and that he should try giving me a ring today. Which he did, and we spoke. It was an awkward call, neither of us are much for phone chatter. He eventually got around to asking me out, and so we have plans to get together one night this week. Though, like last time, all we have is a night – no specific plans, no time, no place. Argh.

Then there are a couple of other guys still out there in cyber space that I’m kind of interested in. One of them is someone I was supposed to meet a long time ago but because of bad timing and unfortunate circumstances in both of our lives we were never able to do it before. I think we might meet this week.

So basically, I’m optimistic about Mr. Potential but if he doesn’t work out I have plans B, C, and D. But that’s nothing new. I guess the only new thing I have to report is that somehow I’ve let the whole weekend pass me by and I still haven’t gotten half way down my to do list. How the hell did that happen?

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8 to “The Weekend is Over”

  1. bobbyboy says:

    I see the glass half full here SG. You did get some things moving forward. I do agree though that every weekend seems to go so fast. I never feel like I’ve accomplished all that I wanted to.

  2. cjw666 says:

    Perhaps you should steer Mr, Potential towards SLDC, because I suspect that you said “not tonight”, meaning “Hey, you’re welcome in my bed, baby, but tonight’s not right,” and he heard, “I like you and I don’t want to be unkind, but sex is not on the menu,” or “You could get lucky, but I’ll tell you when!”

    Only you know if he’s really pretty stuck on you and doesn’t want to push things and lose you.

    If you really are seriously looking for an LTR and you don’t want to keep getting an asshole who’s the same as the last one, just maybe you need to stop being quite so NYC some of the time. Just a thought ๐Ÿ˜‰

  3. lisaq says:

    Haha…not getting things on my to do list done happens to me more than it doesn’t! Sheesh!

    I hear you on Mr. Potential. Sounds like he needs to step it up a bit. Maybe he’s more comfortable with you taking the lead though like you that’s not what I want either.

  4. bobbyboy says:

    To touch on what cjw and Lisa said, I tend to think they may be correct. As a shy guy, I understand that perspective. If Mr. Potential is a shy one, he may indeed have heard something different than what you said.

    Men, not just woman, have their own language sometimes. Woman may say one thing, but mean another, while men may listen to one thing, yet hear another.

    I think you are going down the right course and have done the right things. Just keep in mind, he may not be reading you as well as you want him to at this point. He will however become more comfortable with a bit of time. Also, he may not have the dating experience that others do.

  5. SINgleGIRL says:

    I hear you ALL. I understand that Mr. Potential and I might be speaking totally different languages here. I guess, for me, it comes down to not knowing who to direct my frustration at (because I am frustrated – I mean – right now my week is booked til the weekend with other people/things because he didn’t speak up and I wasn’t going to reserve time for him if he didn’t explicitly ask me to). Should I be frustrated at him for not being more aggressive(at first he did seem a bit more aggressive, if he hadn’t I doubt we ever would’ve gone out) or at myself for expecting him to bounce back at my suggestion that on the 3rd date we wait until another night to go up to my place? Maybe I should be frustrated with the both of us?

  6. bobbyboy says:

    SG, being frustrated is normal at times. You have things to do and dates to fit in as you can.

    I would try not to be frustrated at yourself or him because I think the feeling out process is different for many people. He also may have had some other things going on and couldn’t plan for a date with you yet.

    My Mom was great at sayings and used to tell me, “One step at a time.”
    I never wanted to hear it then, but she was right.

  7. SINgleGIRL says:

    Your mom was right. One step at a time. And I need to learn to curb some of my restless, type A nature.

    Difficult, but not impossible.

  8. bobbyboy says:

    Good for you SG!!

    There are those who are open to changing themselves when necessary, and those who aren’t.

    You’re clearly the first :)