Real stories about dating and relationships in New York City. Truth is more interesting than fiction.


No, this isn’t about my date with necking guy last night. I WILL write about that later. Honestly, I’m still figuring out what I think and feel about him. He’s an odd one, alright.

In the meantime…
I was just just checking my online personals account. I’m lucky enough to work in one of those rare offices that doesn’t block any internet traffic and so I can sit at my desk and check my online personals account and even write this blog entry. I thought I’d take a few minutes to talk about services, as I’m frequently asked about them.
I use the portal. I say portal because their personals feeds into a pool that includes personals from lots of other portals:, Village Voice, The Onion (yeah – even The Onion), probably lots of others too. The reason I use this service is because it seems to have the most members in my target demographic who live in . My target, btw, is men between the ages of 40-50. That’s a moving target, as when I was younger it was 35-45.
The service itself sucks. It’s glitchy as all hell. About 30% of the time when I want to send a reply to a message I’ve received I literally can’t, the service isn’t working right. About 15% of the time I can’t even see my messages. The glitches are relatively new, I don’t recall them being there about a year ago, the last time I used it, prior to my last relationship and its implosion. But it has a multi-tiered cost structure so you can spend as much as $25-50 or as little as nothing, and that’s nice. I spend about fifteen dollars a year on it, no lie.
I’ve tried lots of other online personals companies. was way too suburban for me. I’m personally not looking for a white picket fence or a guy who commutes an hour into the city every day. I don’t have any plans to move to the ‘burbs the second I have a ring on my finger (I’m not even sure I want a ring on my finger, just a body in bed with me every night). I tried Eharmony and thought it was a crock of shit. It was way too time consuming and again pretty suburban.
When it comes down to it, I just need a quick way to screen lots of potential candidates. Nerve lets me do that. It’s a little sleazy sure, lots of guys looking for an easy lay. Then again, if what you’re looking for is an easy lay then it’s the perfect place to look. And there are some guys who at least say they want a , whether they do or not, well, I guess I’ll find out one guy at a time.

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1 to “Quickie”

  1. John B. says:

    Best of luck with your search. Personally I always felt that online matchmaking sites were a waste of time. But I do know people who swear by them.